XIAO LAN:
Shanghai, China - October 1997

My first trip to China, I fell in love, with the country, the people, the architecture, the Great Wall, the night markets, the Great Mosque in Xian, the Bund in Shanghai, but most of all with a little girl.

It was at the end of our three-week tour. I was exhausted and had a terrible cold. The Shanghai museum was filled with kids on school trips, as well as tourists. As I was listening to our lecturer in the sculpture room, a little voice penetrated my consciousness.  I looked around and saw this beautiful little face of a young girl dressed in bright colors and she was definitely speaking to me...
   
  I had to know what she was trying to say to me, and grabbed my guide to translate.  She wanted to try out her English on me.  The rest of her class was hanging back, giggling and watching this brave little girl try to talk to me. I was so charmed by her that I had our picture taken together before her class, and my group, moved on.  Something made me run back and get her address from the teacher so that I could send her the picture, and I learned from the teacher that she had come from Tibet to live with her grandparents in Shanghai. 

Several months after I got home, I finally did write her a letter and send the pictures.  I never heard from her, and although disappointed, wasn't too surprised.  Almost a year and a half later, four days before I was to leave for Shanghai again, I received a letter postmarked from Shanghai. I excitedly ripped open the envelope to find two pages of Chinese characters!!  It was too late to run down to the local Chinese restaurant for a quick translation, so the next morning on the train, I scanned my fellow commuters for Asian faces. I asked a few startled passengers if they spoke Chinese but no luck.  Walking to work down Park Avenue, I stopped a young Asian woman and asked her the same question. Yes, she did, and very amused, she translated the letter there in the middle of the sidewalk.

My letter and pictures had taken almost a year to reach Xiao Lan, but she had known they would come and had looked for them everyday in her mailbox!!  I was so grateful that I had actually sent them. Then she told me her story:  her parents had gotten a divorce and left her and her younger brother with their grandparents and then never heard from them again.  She went on to say that she had seen New York on TV, and she gave me her home address and phone number.

I was amazed at the timing and was determined to see this little girl when I was in Shanghai.  I gathered a few little presents for her and went off to China. With my guide's help, I finally reached her by phone and she immediately invited me to her home, which was about an hour outside of Shanghai city.  We agreed that she would try to meet me in a few days when we were at the Shanghai Museum (her choice since that was where she had first met me).
   
  As I approached the museum, a young man came up and asked if I were Alice Lengers, and then pointed to Xiao Lan, her grandparents, brother and little cousin all lined up on the steps in the drizzly rain with big smiles and gifts for me.  I sent the group on with the lecturer and local guide and kept the national guide to translate. He was the same one who had been with us when Xiao Lan and I met.  I also wanted him to find out what their expectations were because I was not in a position to bring her to the U.S.  He assured me that she was their treasure and they did not want to give her up.  

I took more photos and we had a wonderful visit together. I loved her grandparents, who were not much older than I. After too short a visit, it was time for them to return home and for me to rejoin my group.
   
 

When I got home I again sent the pictures and we exchanged a few letters, she in Chinese and I in English.  There was an inexplicable bond between us.  She was so hungry for a mother, even a distant American mother, and I did not have a family and my own mother had recently died. This relationship was important to both of us.

The next year before my trip to China, I asked if they wanted me to visit them before joining my group in Beijing. Of course, they did, and wanted me to stay with them.  Not knowing their situation I opted to stay in a hotel in Shanghai. My Chinese colleague arranged a car and driver for me, and I asked the family if they knew someone who could translate for us.  We were all very excited!
 
As soon as I arrived in China, I called the family and after several phone calls between Xiao Lan, Ivy (the family friend/interpreter) and me, I went to sleep thinking my visit the next day was all arranged, although Xiao Lan kept trying to say something that I did not understand about her grandfather and 8 am.
   
After finally getting back to sleep after a few hours of fitful sleep, the phone rang at 7:15am. It was Reception saying I had guests waiting for me in the lobby!!  Xiao Lan, her grandfather and little cousin had taken buses and taxis to come get me! I had the driver come pick me up earlier. Luckily up pulled a mini-van because, before the end of the day, we filled the whole van!

I received a warm welcome from Xiao Lan's grandmother and they had a special, delicious lunch prepared for me.  

As I was telling the driver to pick me up at 4:30, I didn't realize that at the same time Xiao Lan was inviting him to lunch, too!  And so we became one big family.  After lunch, we all piled into the van to go to the park.  Now there were 10 of us including the driver!

   
  It was a brutally hot, humid day in the 100's.  I hadn't even been in China 24 hours...

At Xiao Lan's insistence, Xiao Lan, her cousin and I all piled into a little motorboat for a trip around the lake with her younger brother at the wheel.  

After I managed to get over my fear of crashing and falling into that water, I looked up and saw grandmother Li, driver Mr. Quan, Vera and baby in another boat with Ivy at the wheel!  

We all had a wonderful day and made plans for me to return the next day.
   
 
   
 

Instead of going to the seaside for a picnic, they decided to take me to a temple out in the countryside, another steamy day in the 100's.  Our driver was Buddhist, so he was our guide! Then I invited everyone to lunch.  As I was wondering if I was going to have enough cash for what was now dinner for ten, we were seated at a big round table in a private room, just like with our tour groups!
 
While they ordered in Chinese, Ivy helped me order a few things that she knew I could eat.  The first plate to arrive was chicken feet; the second was duck's tongue. I did try to eat the duck's tongue but fortunately the chicken feet were so popular, I didn't have to try to eat those!
 
We all had a wonderful time, and made plans for all of us to repeat the same thing next year, including Mr. Quan.  They all promised to learn more English by then, Grandmother Li was learning one new word a day from a program on TV, and I promised to learn more Chinese.
 
Grandmother Li said to me, "we see you so little, the time we have with you is very precious."  Then she went on to say, that soon these children would grow up and have their own families, then it would be the three of us, Grandfather Zhou, Grandmother Li, and me.  I had this insane vision of the three of us rocking on a front porch. I had never seen anything even resembling a front porch in China.  But I knew that they had accepted and welcomed me into their family. I knew from my Chinese friends, that was for keeps.
 
In my mind, I began to make all these wonderful plans to visit them each year, and perhaps travel in China with Xiao Lan as she got older. She was very artistic, and I wanted to introduce her to an interesting artist I had met in Beijing. And I looked forward to bringing her to the U.S. for a visit or for college if she were able to get a scholarship. I surprised myself by thinking that I could even enjoy grandchildren through her, my Chinese daughter who had adopted me.
 
That was not to be. Several weeks after my visit, Xiao Lan fainted and was diagnosed with a congenital heart defect requiring surgery. They sent me a message that her grandparents were looking for the best doctor for her, that that kind of surgery was routinely done in China, and that Xiao Lan was confident and I was not to worry.  I sent a message to Xiao Lan and tried to get more information about her condition, and how soon surgery was necessary, before I had to leave again on another tour. But they had moved into their new, modern apartment and I didn't have their new address and phone number.

A month later when I returned home, I knew there would be a message and there was.  Xiao Lan had died two weeks earlier.  For some unknown reason, the U.S.-trained surgeon who was to have operated on her did not; the surgery, which should have taken only 3-4 hours, lasted for more than 7 hours, and two days later, she died. Her grandparents said that she had received the photos I had sent of our visit together and she had taken them to the hospital to show the doctors. She knew she was loved.

 

   
 

You can help save another child's life...

I have been searching for a way to create a meaningful memorial to this very special, brave and determined young girl, which would also benefit another little Chinese child.

Through friends who have adopted babies from China, I learned about Dr. Peggy Gurrad and her extraordinary work with Chinese orphanages in Jiangxi Province. Dr. Gurrad works through Altrusa International of Longview-Kelso Foundation and the Amity Foundation in China.

I invite you to join me in raising funds to provide heart surgeries for orphaned children.  Any amount is welcome to help make a difference in a little child's life.

Altrusa is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization in the U.S., so your entire donation is tax-deductible. Perhaps your employer has a "Matching Gift Fund" which would double your contribution.

You may send a check made out to Altrusa Foundation, with the notation "Xiao Lan Memorial" in the memo line to:

Altrusa International of Longview-Kelso Foundation, Inc.
c/o Dr. Peggy Gurrad
P.O. Box 1354
Longview, WA  98632

If you have any questions or comments, I would love to hear from you at  alengers@aol.com 

I know that we can do this and I thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Sincerely,
Alice Lengers
   
 

So far, donations have be used to fund a heart surgery for:

HXM (in photo at right) is a ten-year-old child residing in the orphanage in Ghanzhou who was badly in need of surgery to correct a congenital heart defect.

We are also sponsoring school tuition fees.

For further information please refer to our Heart Surgery Fund page.
   
 

 

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